Commandments 5-10 (How We Relate to Others)

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#5: “Honor your father and your mother…” (Exodus 20:12).

• The first relationship we are told to pay attention to is the one we have with our parents. We must be careful not to take this to mean that we affirm or go along with everything parents say or do with no qualification, especially in situations where parents may not be living righteously.
• What it does mean is that we should do our best to show parents respect as the ones who brought us into the world and that we should look to learn from any wisdom they may have to offer us.

#6: “Do not murder” (Exodus 20:13).

• For most of us, this isn’t hard to follow on the surface. The majority of us will come to the end of our lives having never murdered anyone. But this commandment takes on greater meaning when we read Jesus’ words in the New Testament regarding murder in the Sermon on the Mount. Jesus says that “everyone who is angry with his brother or sister will be subject to judgment,” not only those who take someone’s life (Matt. 5:22).
• In that light, when we read this commandment we should not only think, “Alright, I’m good as long as I don’t kill anybody,” but also, “Man, I really need to work hard to not be angry at the people around me for foolish things.”

#7: “Do not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14).

• This commandment is not just directed toward husbands and wives, nor is it only directed toward physical intimacy. Adultery is being physically unfaithful to a spouse, yes. But adultery is also having sex when you’re an unmarried, single person. And Jesus in Matthew 5:28 tells us that adultery is also looking at another person lustfully.
• In that light, then, when this commandment comes to mind, we should not only think, “As long as I don’t cheat on my spouse, I’m doing the right thing,” but also, “My sexual integrity is measured both physically and in my heart and mind.”

#8: “Do not steal” (Exodus 20:15).

• This commandment helps us recognize that any time we take something that’s not ours, other people get hurt. Loved ones may miss something valuable, and businesses lose out on their livelihood. Stealing can also betray a sense of trust that God really is going to provide everything we need.
• The next time we are tempted to steal something, even something as seemingly insignificant as the stapler on our desk at work, we need to remember that someone is going to feel the effects of our choice and that if we really need a stapler all that badly, God is going to work hard on our behalf to ensure we get one.

#9: “Do not give false testimony against your neighbor” (Exodus 20:16).

• Any time we say something that isn’t true, especially about a person’s behavior or character, we have violated this commandment. Doing so drives a wedge between us and the one we are speaking about.
• We should diligently speak the truth and accurately represent every person around us when we talk about them. Being known as a person with this kind of integrity will give us a good name in our family and community and help us be a light in the darkness that we see around us every day.

#10: “Do not covet your neighbor’s house. Do not covet your neighbor’s wife, his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor” (Exodus 20:17).

• Beyond just taking possession of something that belongs to someone else, this commandment tells us that we also shouldn’t be looking around at the things other people have and wishing we had them instead. These feelings promote resentment in us and are again evidence that we are not trusting God to give us what we need.
• When we can come to a place where we live free from this kind of envy, we will find that we feel more secure in the hands of God and that we have a better chance of having good relationships with others around us.

These six commands can be summed up under the second most important command that Jesus gave us in Mark to love our neighbors as ourselves (Mark 12:31). Living according to these standards gives us a better chance of having healthy relationships, and is a reflection of the depth of our relationship with God.